7 things that Jessica Simpson is…

January 8, 2008

A lot of people are talking about the so called Jessica Simpson curse. Jessica Simpson may be a lot of things but a curse isn’t one of them unless of course she was your over zealous ex-wife out to ruin you through a family court situation. Seeing as she hasn’t squeezed out a gaggle of kids in an effort to increase her situation on the dole, this is hardly a concern for any man.

Things that Jessica Simpson is…

  • A major distraction; simply by being a beautiful woman
  • A decent singer; based upon her album sales
  • A capable dancer; based upon the music videos I have watched her body parts move to
  • A reported actor; I haven’t seen any of her movies to accurately judge but once she does a nude scene I swear I will go and rate her performance
  • A dumb blonde; not that there is anything wrong with that
  • Wealthy; music, film and spokes model earnings are envious to be sure
  • Single; given her wealth, looks and IQ this one just doesn’t make any sense

Jessica Simpson is many things but a curse… I don’t think so. If she is a curse by just being beautiful then wouldn’t all of the cheerleaders at the games be a curse as well? Seeing as every team has them I could hardly say that they are.In an effort to disprove the whole “Jessica Simpson curse” thing I say let’s stick her in a cheerleader outfit and send her to the game to cheer on Tony Romo and the Dallas Cowboys. I don’t know about you but I would love to see her in those “tighty whities” with the little blue stars.

Things that Jessica Simpson isn’t…

  • A curse; give your head a shake
  • Giving me any; that might make her a bitch but a curse – never
  • A porn star; mores the pity

Jessica – don’t let those jealous souls try to make you think that you are a curse. Tony may be a little distracted at the moment but who can blame him. Sure you may look down and see the number “6” while wearing his jersey but hey, that kind of thing only makes you more endearing.

Go to the game and enjoy your relationship while it lasts. Who cares about the Super Bowl as it is only “a cup” and as long as Tony is with you he has a couple of  “d cups” and I ask you – who really is the winner?

E. Zack Lee


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